Friday afternoon through Sunday evening I labored to get little Peanut out. I wanted a natural and un-medicated childbirth, but by the time contractions stayed consistently around 5 minutes, I was already very sick. Peanut was sunny-side up, which is a very poor position to labor in, it causes back labor, which is worse than regular labor (so I'm told, I'm inclined to agree) long labors and long deliveries. In my case, Peanut actually ended up getting stuck, so I dilated to a 6, and then stopped. They tried to increase the intensity with drugs, but that also didn't work, nor did the epidural. The doctor told me I really only had one option left, a C-Section.
I was scared about it, but defeated, I suspected Boi was as well. I couldn't imagine going on another hour or two till even another check, never mind making it to 10 some day and pushing. So we agreed, they stopped the drugs, and gave me something to slow down my contractions. Stuff happened around me, time seemed to go so slow while we waited. All I could do was keep breathing, keep breathing, keep Boi giving me counter-pressure, keep breathing.
The first thing I think I said when he was born, I believe, was 'Is he still a boy?' And when he cried his first, I immediately teared up. I shooed Boi away to go be with him, told him to take lots of pictures, asked the anesthesiologist to make sure he was taking lots of pictures. Both Peanut and I continued to cry. I heard them ask Boi if he wanted to trim the cord, I think he said "I guess." If I could have I likely would have chuckled there, that's my decisive husband! I couldn't really see anything that was going on. Finally though they brought him over for me to see. I could touch him and see him, and I wanted so badly to kiss his face but he was just out of reach for that. They told that the little grunting noises were likely just fine, but they were going to go check it out so he couldn't stay. I ordered Boi to follow and to 'take lots of pictures.' The anesthesiologist offered me some valium to help me sleep, and I soon felt groggy.
I must have fallen asleep as I heard someone say I had gotten a nap. They got me back on my bed and wheeled me back to my room. I don't remember if Boi was there then or not, I was pretty out of it. I think he was, as I think after a bit I asked him to go back to the nursery. When he returned, he told me that the grunting noises Peanut was making had them concerned, and they were going to do xrays. (It turns out my friend 'I' actually was the one to do the xrays on him) Commence more crying! He told me that the pediatrician would be in within an hour with the results. We sat there and talked, we may have turned on ESPN by this point as background noise, trying to come to terms with the last few days.
Then the pediatrician came in with the news, Peanut had a pneumothorax, or a collapsed lung, and there was air in his chest cavity. It may heal on it's own, the body may absorb the air, but there was a good chance he would be sent down to the good NICU an hour away. We asked a lot of questions, trying to figure out what was all going on. They were going to do a second xray soon to see if it was getting better or worse. Commence more crying!
In the end, the second xray was worse, so they did a procedure to extract some of the air until the NICU team could arrive. It had been about 2 hours after the surgery, I was starting to get feeling back in my legs, and the nurses told me if I thought I could manage they would get me in a wheelchair and take me down. Slowly, with much dizziness and nausea, they got me into the chair and took me to the nursery. They placed him in my arms and finally I could see him, kiss him, smell him, everything I wanted to do when they first brought him to me. He was covered in wires and on oxygen, but that didn't really matter because he was my Peanut and I was holding him and in heaven. Alas, life decided to just be that much more cruel and the heat from his bed made me very very nauseous and I had to cry out for someone to take him so I could grab my puke bag and try very hard not to vomit, as who knows what kind of crazy pain that would have done to my incision. My nurse was there though and pushed a pillow against my stomach to help soften the blow, and I was able to breathe it away. But I was no longer comfortable with the idea of holding him, so Boi took him and I stared sadly at them, knowing that soon he'd be taken away.
In the end, Peanut healed his own lung. I was released after 36 hours so I could go be with him. He had IVs all over his body throughout the week, including his head. He had lots of visitors, Mom, Dad, Brother and K. At one point they were going to release him on Wednesday, but then that got scrapped when he had a 'spell' where his heartbeat and breathing dropped to dangerous levels multiple times one morning. On Saturday we arrived to room in with him for the night. We had a good time, watched the Badgers and Bambi, kept him fed and dry, he somehow managed to gain 5 oz that night :)
Now he's home, bruised some, but a whole happy boy sitting in his swing/chair while I quickly type this up. He's got a crazy appetite, but we're catching up with him despite the challenges we faced. I'm a little sad that Boi has to go into work tomorrow, he was supposed to have till Wednesday off, but I know we'll be ok. The cats have started to get curious about him, but they've learned approaching him gets them sprayed, so they've started to scale that back. Now we're looking forward to our first night together at home :)
I'm sorry you had to go through all those hard and difficult days. Things not always happen as we planned them to. But, the outcome was the same we all where waiting for...you holding your precious little angel.
I'm glad all is over and now you might be curling up in bed or couch with Logan :) He must be getting stronger with the passing hours!
We are waiting for your permission to go up and see you guys. No pressure though, get settled first. We can definitely learn some patience out of this, hehe.
Enjoy your time with your Logan, and see you soon!
Posted by: Jarmi | Tuesday, 04 October 2011 at 11:22 AM
Like Tony told Mike, you guys are welcome up anytime. I thought he said you were coming up this weekend?
Posted by: Verde | Tuesday, 04 October 2011 at 11:54 AM